I’m so behind. This is a national holiday week, and I didn’t even buy a Hallmark card to mark the occasion! What will my friends think? Oh, what a social snafu.

According to ABC, this is National Stay At Home Week. It conveniently coincides with the premiere of the new television season. So just in case you had planned to have quality family time around the dinner table, volunteer for your neighborhood patrol group, feed the homeless or get some exercise…

You’ll have to cancel your plans! Pluck your favorite sweatpants from the bottom of your dirty clothes pile, plop yourself down on your couch, grab that bag of potato chips, and enjoy the greatness of Desperate Housewives, a six-hour marathon of Dancing with the Stars, Ugly Betty, Grey’s Anatomy, and that new family favorite, Opportunity Knocks (which looks dumb, but what do I know?). Watching TV is a whole lot better than reading with your kids, solving the energy crisis or ending world hunger. You can do that next week. This week is a holiday! Time to sit lazily on your rear end and be irresponsible! If not, I question your patriotism.

And for those of you who are a bit embarrassed that you forgot to buy me a gift for such a grand occasion… you can make up for it by leaving me a comment telling me which show(s) YOU can’t wait to watch this season! In case anybody is wondering… don’t call me Thursday at 8:00 p.m., because I have a date with The Office.