Academia

I’m at my academic research conference in Miami, and it’s quite a an experience. I’m one of about five non-PhD’s in a room of 100 people, which means I’m the only one who doesn’t dream about T-tests and regression analysis. They want to publish a 10o-page thesis on some obscure communication theory… I want to publish silly junior high fiction. 

But it’s good to be exposed to new things. This is a counter-culture of people that I never really understood before, but after listening to 24 research papers be presented today (no kidding) I have a better idea of just what it means to be an academic. And I know I’m not one of them.
Please say a little prayer for me tomorrow as it’s my turn to present my research… 26 glorious pages on employee engagement, control mutuality and dialogic communication. Some of these PhD’s may eat me alive, and I think they’re going to enjoy it.
Also say a prayer that I don’t die of starvation. I’m not a picky eater… the only thing I don’t eat is fish and cheesecake. Guess what they served for lunch… fish and cheesecake. Which  meant that all I got were a few bites of powdered mashed potatoes and some zucchini. By early afternoon, I started a desperate search of our hotel for anything edible. I was told by an employee that there was NOTHING for me to eat. No candy bar, no spare cookie, no hamburger at the grill… apparently I’m staying in the only hotel in America without even a vending machine. I pleaded with the gal, telling her I would pay for the food, if they could just find me SOMETHING. Maybe I looked like I was about to break down, because she eventually left and came back with a slightly-smashed nutra-grain bar. She probably dug it out of her purse. Bless her. 
Back to the adventure… I guess I’ll go learn something.

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